Even with the bar lights glaring at me, I couldn’t see myself. I couldn’t recognise this person that occupied the body that is usually mine. She seemed happier, freer, less self-conscious and more daring.
This new person downed her fifth glass of tequila and got up to join her partner on the small passageway between two tables that passed for the dance floor that night.
I knew she was not drunk, her gait was still stable. She had just had enough to give her the confidence to get out of her comfort-not-so-comfortable zone.
She grabbed him by the neck and leaned backwards into him while swinging her waist to the rhythm of Take You Down by Rock City. She then did something close to a ‘squats’ move at the part where the song says, tonight I’m gonna take you down. Lord knows this doesn’t feel anywhere as hard as the squats I have to do every morning, even if the dip is lower!
She know the guys on the next table are watching, but she doesn’t care. She came to have fun and forget. This new person usually takes over when I’m stressed and I just want to let go of it all. When I need to give up control.
But even in the glare of these bar lights, I couldn’t find a trace of the all-in-control version of me! All I could think of what an epic fail these bright lights in the bar were. I mean, what do you need them for??
Okay, maybe to stare at beautiful people.